One question we get a lot in the wedding stationery business is how to properly address envelopes. And while we help our engaged couples, we also thought (especially around this time of year), we could all use a quick refresher just in time for sending out holiday cards!

With that being said, we’re also always up for a little breaking of the rules. We believe that yes, there is tradition, but you should be able to do things your way. It’s 2018 people, if you want to address an envelope with “Harry + Jen”, it’s 100% okay with us.

So here are some basic tips on addressing so you can be confident you aren’t offending all of your long lost relatives on your list.

How to address to:

A married couple: Mr. and/& Mrs. John Doe

A same-sex married couple: Mr. John Doe and/& Mr. Steve Smith

Note - Use Mr. and Mrs. addressing to the males first name and shared last name.

A married couple with different last names: Mr. John Doe and/& Mrs. Jane Smith/Smith-Doe

Note - The males name typically goes first.

An unmarried couple that lives together: Mr. John Doe and/& Mrs. Jules Smith

Note - You will usually list the names in the order of how you know them best. If you knew Jules better than she would be addressed first.

A family: Mr. and/& Mrs. John Doe and Family or The Doe Family

A few more things to remember when sending cards:

1. Try not to brag or overshare. Mentioning a couple accomplishments is definitely okay and it will give aunt Sally something to talk about at Bingo, but going on and on about yourselves can be a little boring. Same goes for making a political statement or anything else than can be touchy. Keep the sentiment cheerful and positive.

2. Include a photo but only if you want to! It’s fun to see friends and families holiday cards each year but I must admit I do love receiving a beautiful designed card with no photo at all. If staging a family holiday shoot is too much this year, don’t skip out on sending a card all together just send a pretty one sans pic!

3. Don’t forget to proofread people’s names! Sarah will appreciate you added the h to her name if that’s how she spells it ;)

4. When do I send? The first week of December (now) is best but 2-3 weeks before Christmas will ensure it arrives in time.

Now get your addressing done! Or send out New Year cards if you’re a procrastinator like me;)