Monthly Notes No. 1 • Thoughts Going Into the New Year
You often feel tired, not because you’ve done too much, but because you’ve done too little of what sparks a light in you.
-Alexander Den Heijer
Aside from the obvious hurdles we all faced last year, there was one thing that caught me off guard. In the beginning of 2020 I was constantly stressed about keeping our business afloat. Not because business was bad, but because I had taken on things that weren’t a right fit for me. I thought that the steps I was taking were the steps that I SHOULD have been taking at that point in running a business. Following in the path’s of others led to a form of burnout that I didn't even realize I was in until the middle of last year (when biz slowed down and I had to take a hard look at what I was doing and what I could continue doing). I always thought burnout meant late nights, lots of stress, etc. which has never been my problem. So when I started reading more about how it can affect you when you’re simply on the wrong path a lightbulb went off. I’d just been chugging along, creating more and more of what I thought I should. And when I finally stopped to look back, I felt lost and didn’t know what my next move was.
Up until that point, I had just let things happen. I hadn’t set thoughtful goals in a long time. When someone asked for something, we basically added it to our list of offerings. The word “NO” didn’t exist. Of course, it led to a lot of great things and pushed me to explore parts of the business that I probably wouldn’t have otherwise. But like I said, it led me down some paths that weren’t right for me.
I took the end of last year to step back and assess what was going to make me happy this year. It’s easy to go with the flow when the flow is generating money. But what I want more than that this year is to have a vision and goals that mean something. I want to dive deeper into things that I love (one big example is interiors) and stop thinking that I can’t because it doesn’t fit with what I’ve been doing all along. I want to share more progress instead of trying to perfect everything before I put it into the world. I want to find new ways to get inspired instead of turning to instagram. I want to make the small things more enjoyable and special; at home, at work, and in relationships.
If there’s anything I can take away from the past year, it’s that the things that we neglect most when life picks up are actually the most important. I’m looking forward to creating and living a bit slower. Focusing more on what is important and best for me, rather than what my life and business looks like to anyone watching. So while 2020 had so many terrible things, it also brought the opportunity I am grateful for. It forced me to reevaluate. I’m looking forward to diving back in this year, refreshed, and I hope that you all can feel (and enjoy) the changes that will bring!
